Confessions of a woman who doesn't like to shop

Call me crazy- but I do not like shopping for clothes. 

--I don’t like the process of trying things on or taking the time to find things that fit. I'm lazy like that. 

--I struggle with feeling comfortable shopping in stores that I perceive to be “chic” or “ hip”.  Truth be told, even though my children would love for me to fall into those categories- I really am quite ordinary. 

--I also think clothes can be too expensive. Therefore, I find myself looking for sale items or good deals -- even when I would prefer something more expensive.   

The whole process makes me feel self conscious and inept.  I don’t know what style to pick, what color to choose, or if it is a good “ piece” to add to my wardrobe.

Well, last Thursday I attempted to shop for clothes. I headed to Friendly Shopping Center and commenced my normal routine- start at Banana Republic, then The Limited, Old Navy, The Gap, Belk and last, Macy’s. Just when I thought I was going to leave empty handed--- I met Ms. Janice Paschal at Macy’s. Unbeknownst to me, I saved the best for last!

Janice saw me coming with my stack of clothes and offered to find me a fitting room. From that point on, she reminded me that excellent customer service often seals the deal.

1) She introduced herself and made eye contact with me.

2) She asked my name and offered to help me get other clothes.

3) She followed, calling me by my first name and asking if things were going well.

4) She assisted me with the belt and zipper.

5) She offered accessorizing help----i.e. what color shoes to wear, what style of jewelry.

6      6) She discounted my purchase with both a Macy’s charge and a coupon.

The wonderful Ms. Janice Paschal. I'm betting local shoppers recognize her.

Best of all, Janice made me laugh and feel comfortable. At one point, I could not figure out how a belt was supposed to work with the dress I was trying on. It appeared to be positioned at the top of the zipper on the back of the dress. I asked if she could help me figure out how to tie it. Janice studied the belt and draped each side over my shoulder. She then proceeded to tie it around my neck (see picture below). At the same time, she and I both burst out laughing!  Obviously, that wasn’t what the designer intended! After much thought, we figured out that the belt was stuck in the top of the zipper and in the wrong place all together. It was to be tied underneath my arms and around my ribs.

After the morning of shopping, I ended up buying only one item--the dress seen in the picture with Janice. Regrettably, that was the only item that fit. However, I don’t feel like my shopping experience was for naught. In fact I gained so much more than a dress. I was inspired by Janice Paschal and reminded of what lies at the heart of excellent customer service -- sincerity, the desire to help others around you, and the value of taking your work, but not yourself, too seriously.

I'd love to hear from you. What shopping tips or experiences do you have to share? Or just simply tell us where you found an unexpected moment of inspiration -- because the possibility of being inspired lies around every corner.

Alexis Williams may not be a good housekeeper and she’s even worse at being the tooth fairy. But she loves laughing, traveling, spending time with family and being a part of a community that makes a difference. Alexis is officially Inspired Wining's “go-to girl” for just about everything from developing community partnerships to securing our venues for Inspired Wining on Location events. A wife, mother of 3, a church and school volunteer, Alexis is the sharp-witted sweetheart of the group.

Note to self

Recently, a friend of mine posed this question on Facebook:  “If you could go back in time and tell a younger version of yourself just one thing, what would you say?”  

This inquiry really got me thinking.  If I could send my Younger Self a list of many things to avoid, they would include the obvious:  don’t waste your time with that relationship, don’t wear that outfit, and don’t ever do that to your hair.  Of course, there would be some more practical life pointers as well:  save more, spend less, and take good care of your health.  

But, if I could only say one thing, I would have to choose my words carefully.

As I looked back and tried to determine what nugget of wisdom would be most beneficial to younger me, it became apparent that it is something that I still struggle with today.  Maybe if I had learned it at a younger age, it would be second nature by now?

"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may 

look back and realize they were the big things."

                                                                                            ~Robert Brault

So Younger Self, here it is:  

Learn to make the most of today, and find something about it to enjoy instead of constantly looking forward to tomorrow, next week or next month.  Don’t get me wrong  Younger Self, you have been great at making memories and making the most of the big days, the big life events:  the wedding day, the amazing travel, the first time each of your children were placed in your arms (yes I said children - as in more than one - don’t freak out Younger Self).

However, you have not done all that you could to make the most out of the everyday.  If I/you/we had a dollar for every time we have had the thought that life will be better or easier or somehow more memorable “after” – after I get thru this week at work, after our schedules slow down, after the kids are out of school, etc./etc./etc., we would be very, very rich by now.

 

Of course, it is important to stay positive and to be focused on the future.  But, in the midst of all that forward thinking, the current day and all it has to offer tend to get lost in the four loads of laundry that need to be done.  

Now Younger Self, I am not suggesting that every day is going to be sunshine and rainbows because that is not the way life works.  What I am suggesting is that if you look hard enough you can find something to celebrate, appreciate, or make memorable in even the darkest of days.  Sometimes it’s just an encouraging word from a friend or a hug from your child, but those little things are worthy of special memories too.

So Younger Self, enjoy today and don’t wait for tomorrow to make those memories.  Drink that bottle of wine that you are saving for a special occasion, wear those special heels that make you feel fantastic, and take the time to tell your friends and family how much they mean to you because “after” is not guaranteed to any of us.  

Michelle Gauffreau is a customer service consultant for Broadcast1Source and  a founding member of Inspired Wining. She is also a wife, a mother of two and an active volunteer in her community.

Inspiration - Olympics style

I don't know about you, but I love the Olympics. I can't get enough of them. I tolerate a constantly running television to make sure I catch track and field, gymnastics, swimming, diving, field hockey, table tennis, and -- who knew - trampoline.

I find it so inspiring that many of these athletes train most of their lives for this moment. It's thrilling to imagine them as young boys and girls, the time when a seed was planted in their souls - the hope that they, too, would someday perch proudly atop the podium as the crowd cheers and their flag ripples before them.

And now they've made it. This time, to London -- all the training and the sacrifices leading them to a collection of moments in which they have to be at their very best. Total victory or the crush of defeat (if you can call it defeat) is determined by the narrowest of margins... and then it's over in a breath, it seems. Until the world's greatest gathering of athletes meets again four years.

Tomorrow at 2:45 PM, my favorite team of all, the U.S. Women's National Soccer Team takes on Japan for their fourth gold medal. Their 4-3 nail-biter, semifinal win (seriously, my own fingers are proof) ended with a goal by Alex Morgan in the last 30 seconds of overtime. Inspiration at its finest.

In honor of the Olympics, I thought I'd share a few other inspirational Olympic moments and images...starting, of course, with Jennifer Ennis' abs (you heard me.) Please leave a comment and share your own sources of Olympic inspiration.

Dailymail.co.uk

Okay, so Jennifer Ennis. She won the gold medal in the heptathlon, which was impressive to say the least. But also inspiring are her chiseled abs. As an Inspired Winer, I also love that in a recent story by The Sun she plans to enjoy some wine post competition. "I'm definitely going to relax, eat lots of rubbish food, have a few glasses of wine, and enjoy this moment for as long as possible," she said. Cheers to that!

Next on the list are pretty much everyone else's abs, including but not limited to: English footballer Micah Richards, Brazilian beach volleyball babe Juliana Silva, U.S. freestyle wrestler Jordan Burroughs, English diver Tom Daley, and the entire U.S. Men's Swim Relay Team.

Michael Steele/Getty Images

How about South African Oscar Pistorius, who made history by becoming the first double-amputee athlete to compete in track & field? Oscar made it all the way to the semifinal in the men's 400 meters. According to a NY Times article, he did not look disappointed when finishing last in the semifinal. Instead, he was overjoyed with his accomplishment.

And, as you might imagine, I have to give a shout out to Alex Morgan for that game-winning goal against Canada. But I can't do that without giving a ton of credit to teammate Megan Rapinoe. Without her two back-to-back goals, the U.S. wouldn't have been able to clinch the win in the final seconds and earn that gold medal game spot. The video is worth a look.

BBC

And while there are so many more people and moments to celebrate about the Olympics, I'll end by giving props to Queen Elizabeth. She took us all by surprise during the opening ceremonies by showing us that despite the royal family's long tradition of formality and reservation, there is indeed a time to cut loose and have fun.

Not only was it hilarious to imagine her skydiving down into the center of all the opening ceremony action, it was fun to detect a little nervousness in the debonair Daniel Craig as he performed the Bond skit alongside the Queen. Cheers to her for reminding us that shared laughter is another form of inspiration...a language that transcends borders and cultures.

Being the makers of our future

One of the hardest parts about being a parent of a boy with Duchenne is worrying about how the changes and hardships will affect our son emotionally.  Just like any other parent, my primary goal is to ensure the happiness of my children.  As the years go by, I understand that my fears are just that – my fears.  I look at his disorder from the perspective of a healthy adult who has lived half of her life already.  It is impossible to imagine my life as a handicapped individual.

Matthew is not yet handicapped, and God willing, he may never bear that title.  He has, however, in his short life, endured a number of difficulties, treatments and limitations.  The fact is that he has navigated all of these experiences beautifully because they were his alone and a child has the benefit of owning who he is much easier than an adult can, in most cases.  

Duchenne will always be a part of who he is, but that is not necessarily a tragedy.

 

The keynote speech by Luca Buccella at the PPMD Annual Conference this summer illustrates this point beautifully.  As an adult with Duchenne, who has endured many of the changes that DMD brings, he still has a positive outlook on life and his purpose in life.  For me, his words are soothing and healing because they resonate hope and strength for our boy and our family. I share them with you:

Hello everybody, my name is Luca Buccella, I am twenty-one, and I'm here to tell all the boys with DMD and their parents, that a future is there. And I can say that honestly, because the future that I started planning when I was eight has now become my present. To tell everybody that even the "less fortunate" can have a full life.

In many charity campaigns - at least in Italy, I don't know if it's the same in the United States - we hear the expression "less fortunate than us" referring to disabled people. Well, I feel I'm fortunate, or lucky, in many fields. And then, is there such a thing as fortune? Actually, fortune is useless without a strong will. But with your will, fortune becomes mere clay, that you can reshape and transform with your bare hands, just as you wish.

We must be the first to consider ourselves as the normal people we are: the revolution must start within us. But it's not because of our disability that we must take things for granted: we must earn our chances, nothing's free, we have the same rights and duties of every other human being.

Our bodies are handicapped, not our souls: DMD doesn't determine the people we are, it doesn't make us better or worse than anyone else. But it's a part of ourselves that we must learn to live with. It doesn't represent what we are, but it may be considered as a friend, sometimes annoying, with whom we must learn to coexist despite the fights. It's not a part of ourselves, but it compenetrates us, and, if lived positively, can even make us better people.

Just remember that it's not the disease that makes us better, but the way we face it. We must never think that our disability makes us better than others, or even special. We are unique, but that's just like every other human being. We don't want to be seen as pure spirits, light bearers with our soul tempered by years of sacrifices: our disease doesn't determine our future, we have to do it. We can be anything we want to be, if we convince ourselves. And to become the people we want to be, it is essential to start planning our future.

And on this specific aspect, I'd like to address myself particularly to parents. You are the first who must raise your children giving them a certainty that a future does exist, and so it must be planned and considered. Because just like everyone else on planet Earth, since the very beginning you must start to build the foundations on which to construct your future.

I've seen far to many people giving up, thinking there was no future for their kids, that they would never reach a certain age. But I believe that this is something you can say for any individual, because no one has the certainty of what's going to happen tomorrow. Abandoning every hope, convinced that there is no future for DMD patients, would be like stopping to drink and eat, because eventually life is going to end and nothing can change that. Whereas life must be planned, dreams must be pursued, and human relations must be cherished, no matter what. Because otherwise, at the age of twenty, you find yourself with no passions, no interests, no love: and so, you don't have a present.

I owe my parents the fact that I've never felt different: so, as they did, allow your children to take risks, to fail sometimes, to savour life in every aspect good or bad. You'll see the results, and your kids will be grateful. Just remember that first we must realize that we're normal and we can have a full life, than we can show it to the world. You cannot live your life hoping in a miracle, in a prodigious remedy that is going to fix everything.

In this last few years, research has taken a giant leap forward, trials on men has started, showing that maybe a cure is not so far away. But what would happen if you spent your whole life just waiting for a cure that will finally allow you to live what society calls "a normal life", it the treatment doesn't reach you in good time? You would have lost a life just waiting, not living. You must become aware of the fact that you can live a full, happy, satisfactory and meaningful life, that maybe the our disease isn't all bad after all.

We must try and embrace our condition, and then we can start to see upsides. Believe me, they are just as many as the downsides. As my friend Pat Moeschen likes to say "Membership has its privileges". And so, we have reserved parking, we don't have to queue at amusement parks, movie tickets are less expensive. In my country, people think twice before insulting you to your face. And if they do so, we can "wheel" them down! And, in a relationship, a disabled person has the absolute certainty that the person with whom he's involved, really loves him for what he is.

Once we have learned that our disability it's not an obstacle in the pursuit of happiness, if the cure were to arrive, it would still be great. But if this weren't happen, it would not be a problem. Because we had understood that we are, and always be, the makers of our future.

Allison Wood Greiner is a high school French teacher, a founding member of Inspired Wining, and mother to three children, including Matthew, who has Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. 

Smelly sneakers mean a boy's had a good time!

Last week was the best week!  I was in town every day (no business travel) . Our kids were at "grandparent camp," thus the house was clean and quiet. My husband and I actually had 3 date nights. We got to celebrate July 4^th! And, Wednesday Night Whine provided the much needed dose girl and wine time.

Best yet, our kids were having just as much fun as we were. One child was the beach with Scott’s family. And, the other was the mountains with mine. We'd planned a big switch midweek.  

My husband and I enjoyed the nightly updates from each set of grandparents. But, this one in particular made me laugh. While I was Wednesday Night Whining, our son Foster was putt-putting, hitting on girls and stinking up the house. Please read this email update from my dad. I think he has a knack for writing. Perhaps we can convince him to guest blog on Inspired Wining one day!

"Yesterday was a full day and Foster had a great time. First, Foster, Emma and I went to the Inn’s back yard for some baseball, where he hit a home run over the trees (and lost the ball). Then we all went to Mountain Miniature Golf where he scored a 435, not counting Mulligans (all 124 of them). Just kidding, of course, but his math needs some work. Let’s see 3 balls in row off the tee and into the water and then 3 more putts to sink it for a “3”.  Hmmm. 

  

Freedigitalphotos.net

We then went to Jacob’s Ladder Falls with all the Miller kids for a creek walk and a Who-Can-Catch-the-Biggest-Minnow Contest. Girls rule, boys drool!  

Foster paired up with Jake and they really enjoyed the fishing and swimming as the temps approached 80 degrees here in the High Country.

The Millers came back to our house to watch Surf’s Up and Foster took a 1½ hour nap. Fully rested, then it was on to the picnic at the Inn and fireworks.  

Foster hooked up . . . well that’s not the right word today . . . played football with 2 cute, slightly older girls and 2 other boys. Why Foster insisted on shadowing one girl and trying to tackle her whenever she got the ball is beyond me. J

Then the fireworks, without a doubt, the best ever at the Inn. He covered his ears the whole time, but seemed to really enjoy them. 

Going on 10PM, you’d think the day was full enough, but we topped it off with a few WalMart fireworks at the Millers. Then we finally headed to bed, stopping in the bathroom to clean up and wash feet. Foster took off his shoes and everyone keeled over!  I think we’re going to incinerate his tennis shoes today in a sacrificial fire that will surely ward off the deer that keep eating Jennie’s flower and the bear that eats her compost."

Tiffany Crenshaw is a  North Carolina native, wife, mother of 2 wild and crazy kids, and an entrepreneur. She loves her family, a delicious glass of red wine, girl time and the occasional spa treatment. As an enthusiastic member of Wednesday Night Whine, she rarely misses a “meeting” unless she’s traveling for business. She is the President and CEO of Intellect Resources, a recruiting and consulting firm specializing in the healthcare IT industry.